We all start our lives as idealist. We believe in others, we only see good, we love with our whole hearts, we believe the world is a perfect place until we experience otherwise. We crave love, protection, and we believe in magical places and people. Our hearts want a perfect world but as we grow we realize it’s a far cry from perfect. Our nature is to crave a perfect creator, a perfect protector, someone who will save us all. It’s in our blood. It’s in our souls. But how would we know how much we need God if we did live in a perfect world; if we hadn’t experienced darkness firsthand? In our suffering we learn how badly we need him.  I used to believe that Henry David Thoreau was correct when he said that ,“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation.”  That was how I felt most of my life.  I thought how could anyone not be depressed by the mere fact that there is so much suffering in the world. Talk about empathic tendencies.  I didn't show these feelings on the outside, but I sure felt them on the inside. I don’t feel that way anymore.  Though desperation, depression and despair are certainly rampant in our world, it is possible to live a life of joy.I still agree with his quote, but in a different way.  The desperation we feel is for a connection with our creator. A longing to be whole, to be WHOLLY loved by God.  Nothing else can fill that gap.  Sometimes it takes those moments of darkness for us to turn to the light. In our desperation we turn to God and ask for help.  There is purpose in the suffering we endure. It was that understanding that really helped me on this journey.  Knowing there was a purpose to it, that God had me in the palm of his hand.  That's not to say I always felt that way.  I definitely had times I struggled to understand why I had to go through this.   Despite some very dark and difficult moments, I can say, I am grateful I went on this journey. In the words of Beth Moore, "I am better off healed than I ever was unbroken." I continue to trust that God is with me as I know he is with you on your journey. Take comfort in his timing, in his unconditional love for you.  Psalm 41:4 says, "He will cover you with His feathers; under His wings you will find refuge; His faithfulness will be your shield." What an incredible promise of love!